February

Hannah: Mom, everyone I know has their own pet or their own electronic and I don't have either one!
Me: But you have me, and I love you!
(Hannah gives the not-amused look.)
Abby: Well, I get my own phone next year in middle school!
Me: No you don't.
Abby: WHAT?? What if there's an emergency and I need to call you!!
Me: Have one of your friends call me.
(Abby gives me the life-is-so-unfair look.)
I'm sure I'm the lamest mom ever.

Amy Johnson received the Virginia Chandler Dykes award at Texas Women's University for leadership. That's right - my wife is awesome!

 

Abby: Mom, can I use your phone to text my friends?
Me: Sure.
Hannah: (instantly upset) Why does ABBY always get to text HER friends and I NEVER get to text my friends!!!
Me: I don't care if you use my phone. Abby can text for 10 minutes, then you can text for 10 minutes.
Hannah: Nah. I don't want to.

Abby is obsessed with her rainbow loom and enjoys making things other than bracelets. Recently, she made baby Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. She hasn't had time to make their donkey, so they're hanging out in Barbie's pink convertible. They look pretty comfy in there.

(In reference to the movie Frozen.)
Me: You should never agree to marry someone you just met!
Hannah: Yeah, you need to wait awhile to see if he belongs in jail or not.

Hannah: Timmy wants to marry me, so he gives me back massages. He's not any good at it, but I don't tell him that.
Abby: When you're in fifth grade, you'll think boys are disgusting.       

Hannah reports that a girl said the F-word to a friend.
Me: What's the F-word?
Hannah: I don't know, but it's bad. I think it's something like Fryshala.

While I was brushing Hannah's hair, she became thoughtful. "Mom, what if I grow up and don't know how to take care of my kids?" I told her I'd help her, and she began talking to herself. "Okay, I need to learn to cook and do laundry. I'll need to clean, and I'm not very good at that. Oh! I'll make my kids clean." Satisfied, she ended the conversation.