Happy New Year!

Hannah, snuggling up to me:
Oh, Mommy, you’re so lumpy!

The girls like to play Hungry Hippos. Hannah calls it “Hippomisspotamus.”

I asked the girls to put their shoes on, and Hannah complied first. She picked her brown Mary Jane shoes. Abby followed soon after but put two different shoes on. I scolded her, saying that she needed to wear two of the same shoes. “But HANNAH’S not!” On closer inspection, I realized that Hannah was wearing a pair of brown Mary Janes, but something looked strange. One was hers and one was Abby’s.

Since the weather has been so cold, we’ve set up a place for our dog to relax in the house. Since he’s usually an outdoor dog, the girls love it. One day, Goliath was resting, taking it all in. Mike said, “Abby, Goliath is doing a good job of just sitting there, isn’t he?” She replied, “Yeah, he’s just like Daddy.”

With the cold weather, the girls have been indoors much of the time, looking for things to do. They got some bubble gum flavored lip gloss for Christmas. (Thanks, Aunt Shelley!) Today, Hannah said, “Mom, do you want some lipstick?” As she gingerly put it on my lips, she mentioned. “It’s a little hairy. Abby just used it on Goliath.” (Thanks, Aunt Shelley!)

My best friend has lost her baby weight and needs some smaller clothes. Lately, I have not been using my smaller clothes, so I decided to mail them to her. I included some new cute undies as a fun surprise. (Yes, this is quite embarrassing, but it’s a necessary piece of the story.) I packaged the clothes up in the only thing I had available – a Duraflame box. Waiting in line at the post office, the postal workers spoke loudly about my particular box. They decided that it was unacceptable, because it clearly said that the package was flammable. (I always wrap my secretly flammable things in Duraflame boxes, don’t you?) They asked me to get out of line and repackage the items.
I walked over to their “for sale” boxes and ripped my explosive box open. Trying my best to be discrete, I transferred the clothes and undies to an un-sealed box. I got back in line, but they called me up to the front. I know that whenever I am in line for something, and someone behind me gets called to the front, I watch carefully to see what that person’s problem is. So with all eyes on me, I carried the box up to the front, and explained that it was not sealed. The postal worker decided that she could save me $.75 if we switch the contents to an even smaller box. I said, “Okay!” and lifted the box up off the counter. The clothing spilled out, and much to my horror, the unmentionables were laying on the counter for everyone to see.
I bet they wished they had let me use the Duraflame box!

Abby asked, “Mommy, is God funny?” I thought about it and decided that since we are made in His image, yes, he is funny. She asked, “A little funny, or a lot funny?” You know, I never learned this in church. We talked it over and came to the conclusion that if God is omnipotent, omniscient, and omnipresent, He is also omnifunny. He’s the funniest guy we know!

Abby:
“Mom, did Hannah get run over by a car today? She looks a little flat.”